Tamar Braxton sat down with Tamron Hall on the journalist's eponymous talk show on Wednesday, Oct. 28th, to break her silence about the suicide attempt, accusations of domestic violence, Braxton Family Values and her relationship with her sisters, and more.
Back in July, the singer and TV personality tried to commit suicide, shocking and saddening fans. There was speculation that Tamar attempted suicide because WE tv had released the trailer for Tamar Braxton: Get Your Life, which she allegedly thought portrayed her as an “angry Black woman.” In addition, David Adefeso, Tamar’s former fiancé and the person who told police she may have overdosed on alcohol and pills in July, claimed she was physically abusive to him and filed a restraining order against Tamar last month while she was still recovering from the attempted suicide. Tamar has also been at odds with sisters Toni, Trina, Towanda, and Traci Braxton, and has accused them of revealing that she suffered sexual abuse from the age of 6 to 16 for TV ratings. In her first interview since the suicide attempt, Tamar revealed to Hall her personal and ongoing struggles with mental health, and her desire to fix the relationships with her sisters. She also addresses Adefeso, her initial vision for Braxton Family Values and how the series changed from that, the pressure to maintain TV ratings at all cost, whether she’s paying the price for fame, and more.
Tamar on her attempted suicide and if she’s ever tried to end her life before: “I'm just going to be 100 percent. There has been a time where I wanted to, but this was the first time where I’ve actually acted on it.”
Tamar on the status of her medical health: “I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety due to a circumstance ... No, I’m not medicated, but I am in counseling every single day.”
Tamar on the story of her sexual abuse being shared on TV after someone in her family allegedly gave the information to show producers: “My family did an episode with Iyanla [Vanzant] and, and I was excited about it. But that excitement came to an end when she decided to tell everyone that I was domestically sexually abused from the ages of six to 16. And I've never told anyone that.” She added: “It’s not an allegation. It’s a fact.”
Tamar on whether she told anyone in her family about the abuse: “No. And it haunts me. Because to be betrayed, just so people can tune in and laugh at you and judge you and criticize you. It was terrible."
Tamar on going to counseling to try to mend things with her family: "We went for help. Me and my family. We went for counseling ... because the show, it did create a lot of division between me and my sisters and it did create, you know something that was never there which was we couldn’t get along and we couldn’t communicate. We stopped communicating. And we just simply wasn’t a family anymore. And, that help turned into a nightmare for me.”
Tamar on why she wanted to hurt herself and the negative impact of the show: “It was about feeling like I could never be myself and being misunderstood and having the stigma of the angry Black woman all the time. And that's not who I am. That's not what I wanted to portray ... It wasn't just about being an angry Black woman, it was about real issues coming up on the show.”
Tamar on her initial vision forBraxton Family Valuesand how, in her opinion, the show strayed from the original concept: “I love my family. And I don't want to fight with my family. And I want to be an example of a family who fights and argues and always have turmoil. And now we're at the point where it's assaults and threats. This is not the show that I created. I created the Braxton Family Values because I wanted to be an example part of the Black community with five Black amazing sisters, with all different walks of life, who can inspire and help and people can learn from our experiences along the way. We wasn't teaching anything but being devilish and I didn’t want to do that.”
Tamar on the pressure of TV and having a hit show: “I’m not going to sit here and act like a complete victim. I played a part in that. I know what it’s like to keep up ratings and keep up having the number one show on a network and having all of those bells and whistles and that comes with a price. Sometimes that comes with embarrassing your friends or embarrassing your siblings. I don’t think I sold my soul [to keep the show on]. I don’t think at the time I knew exactly what I was doing. I think that for the show and for my family we wanted to have a great show and sometimes that is making the deal with the devil and that is doing things that you wouldn’t normally do.”
Tamar on feeding the fire by unfollowing her family on social media and her relationship with her family: “I talk to my mother every single day.” She continued, “Look, I love my sisters. I feel like I have what I want from them. I have their love. I know my family loves me ... I know, everybody wants me to blame my family. When you sign up for something like this, and you have the kind of people behind the scenes that you have.”
Tamar on what she wants moving forward: “Forgiveness on both sides. There are things that I’ve done that I’m not happy about and that I’m not proud of. I’ve had my dark moments with my family where I feel like, I’m sure that I betrayed them at some point and I feel like forgiveness all the way around.”
Tamar on accusations that she physically assaulted her former fiancé David Adefeso: “I am a survivor of a domestic violence relationship. And not at any point was David and I in an abusive relationship.”
Tamar on how she feels now about David: “No, let me tell you something that I loved David. He was my best friend. He was an amazing, amazing partner. He was my son's best friend as well, they were best friends. And it's just so hard because through everything else I never expected this from him. Now, I have to be real with myself. Is he acting like this because he found me the way that he found me? Probably. I don’t know.”
Tamar on whether she is paying the price for fame: “I don't know what the price is for fame. But I do know that the wages of sin is death, and the gift of God is eternal life. And I know that if you're not rooted and guided, you know, by the Holy Spirit and by your faith, you will fall into, you know, the things that you don't want to be a part of ... I lost my faith, I lost my sense of what I knew, what was right. I didn't always treat people kind and I wasn't always fair. And I didn't always watch my mouth and, you know, do the right thing. But that is my goal now, you know, the things that I've been through, I just felt like God brought me from there to bring me here to be an example, to be better to do better ... It was about the responsibility of mental health. And the responsibility of suicide. It’s a very serious thing. Everything is not for entertainment.”
Tamar on whether or not she is done with reality TV: “Absolutely. And not for a while. Forever and ever amen.” She added: “I feel like that’s the best thing for me. I don’t feel like I need to give a depiction of my life and what’s happening and a play by play.”
*If you are experiencing domestic violence, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233, or go to thehotline.org. All calls are toll-free and confidential. The hotline is available 24/7 in more than 170 languages. If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255), text "STRENGTH" to the Crisis Text Line at 741-741 or go to SuicidePreventionLifeline.org. If you or someone you know need mental health help, text "STRENGTH" to the Crisis Text Line at 741-741 to be connected to a certified crisis counselor.