“And another one bites, and another one bites, another one bites the dust!” are the lyrics on repeat in my head today. My girlfriends and I have been coming across what I consider to be an epidemic lately: Men who believe that we are desperate to have them as our boyfriends.
Listen, I am not bashing love or being in love. Heck, I am all for love and think that when you find someone amazing you should not pass them by. I have come to find that there is a way of thinking when it comes to women and what they want from men. Social media, television, and film all play a role in the way men and women view one another, and has contributed greatly to we women being seen as desperate or needy.
Let’s start this post off with a Public Service Announcement: To men everywhere … not every woman is desperate to have you as their boyfriend. Just because we have gone on a few dates with you, does not mean we are secretly planning our future wedding date in our heads. Women like to have fun with no commitments too sometimes, and if we wanted you to be our boyfriend … trust me, you’d know. There is a stark difference between a woman knowing and verbalizing to you what she wants, and a woman who acts out for your attention. Nude avatars on Twitter, naked selfies on Instagram, and daily Facebook posts containing complaints of loneliness are acts of desperation. A woman you are dating, sitting you down, and telling you she wants to be monogamous is not.” Now that I have gotten that public service announcement out of the way let’s get down to business.
Recently I was dating someone who told me that he felt I wanted something serious, and he did not, so he broke things off. Ummm … excuse me, sir, but when did it become OK for you to decide that you know what I want, and then tell me what I want, and then tell me that you can’t date me because of the assumption you have made about what I want?!! My girlfriend today responded to my text updates on the situation simply with: “Guys just do that.” Really guys? You just do that?! You automatically assume every woman you date is madly in love with you and immediately wants something “serious”?